For over two years now, I've enjoyed being a back row Baptist. Before you judge me prematurely, please give me a chance to explain how being a part of a church without the pressures of full-time ministry draining my husband, my kids, and me has changed my perspective on difficulties in ministry and helped me find joy again.
I have a lot of friends who are ministers' wives. Almost every time I talk to another one of these precious friends, I ask for prayer requests and receive the same one: "Please pray for me to find joy in my every day life." As I speak with them, I catch myself thinking, "I have joy now. When did that happen? How did that happen? Will it go away when we enter full-time ministry again soon?"
I could go on and on about the possible reasons why pastors' wives lose joy. I could list all the negatives of full-time ministry; however, as a back row Baptist for the last two years, I've realized what I do now that I didn't do then. In the past, I looked at all the problems, and I felt helpless. Not only did I feel helpless, I believed I was helpless.
I was looking in the wrong place while sitting on the front row. I was focused on everything behind and beside me.
Now, on the back row, I see the answer clearly. Even though I see the people filling the pews, I now know I must focus on what's above us all. It doesn't matter how big the challenge we face in ministry or how many problems our church family members face individually and collectively. That should not be our focus. We must look to our Father who is bigger than the problems.
This past Sunday, our Life Group teacher used Psalm 3 to show us how David felt overwhelmed as Absalom, his very own son, and what seemed like the whole world wanted David dead, but he lifted his heart in prayer to God and knew with confidence his God was in control.
O Lord, how many are my foes!
Many are rising against me;many are saying of my soul,
there is no salvation for him in God. Selah
I cried aloud to the Lord,
and he answered me from his holy hill. Selah
I woke again, for the Lord sustained me.
I will not be afraid of many thousands of people
who have set themselves against me all around.
Save me, O my God!
For you strike all my enemies on the cheek;
you break the teeth of the wicked.
your blessing be on your people!
my glory, and the lifter of my head.
But you, O Lord, are a shield about me,
I lay down and slept;
Arise, O Lord!
Salvation belongs to the Lord.
So, what are we doing? As church members? As ministers and ministers' wives? Why do we look at our problems and the pressures we face, no matter how big (like David's) or small, and allow them to define our joy? Let's be like David and find our confidence, strength, and protection in the Lord.
I don't want Satan to rob my joy again. I have every power at my disposal to stop him, so do you. And we don't have to be back row Baptists or front row preachers' wives to figure this out. All we have to do is look above the problems to the Author and Perfecter of our faith. He'll take care of the rest.
